Years ago I remember hearing a story about a girl I grew up with fucking herself with a cucumber. That tale always stuck with me until I stuck one in me. This was back in my pre-intercourse days so it wasn't as romantic an experience as I imagined it would be, but it got the job done. When you can't afford toys or the real thing's not available, you've got to think outside of your box girls, and get creative. The same goes for you guys, too. The following list has the ladies in mind, but the men out there can get off on them just as well.
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Ivanka Trump's 'Lap Dance' with Donald
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Why Penile Implants Are the New Boob Job
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I recently met a guy with a sexual secret. He was 39, in great shape, and in his spare time was a CrossFit athlete. But he had diabetes, and he told me that it made him impotent. Besides, an erect, on-demand, rock hard schlong that could go for hours? I was in.